Monday, May 16, 2011
Pingu's Page: The Cut-Throat 'Biaaaatch'!
Pingu's Page: The Cut-Throat 'Biaaaatch'!: "Amber : It’s a game. You can either play for fun or play to win. If you want to win, you want cut-throat...."
Tuesday, May 3, 2011
When did I lose it? #Innocence
‘Swami ondu cheese sandwich kudi’, I asked the NC guy.
The NC guy shouts atop his voice, ‘ONJI CHEESE SANDWICH!’
I pay the bucks and turn my head to the left and a boy small enough to be in school starts to spread butter over the slices of bread. Occasionally he would wipe his nose, and simultaneously sniff the overhanging mucus. Drops of sweat would roll down his cheek. Invariantly some mass would get transferred from his nose to his hand and finally to my sandwich! Bonn appetit.. ;)
What do I do? I assume I suffer from short term amnesia and eat my sandwich.
‘Na tumne kuch kiya, na meine kuch dekha’! ;)
He was not alone, there were two more kids, much younger to him, one of whom served vada pav and the other was in charge for the cold beverages.
Then I began to wonder,1.45am in the night, when boys their age should be sound asleep, all set to go to their learning hubs the next day; These kids were catering to the needs of the ever hungry NITKians! As I learned out later, the sandwich kid was the Egg man’s son and the other two lil fellas were related to the Chef incharge for the Chinese dishes!
Some family tradition must say. We Indians are renowned to extend our *Khandani biznesh* Academic aspirations always loses the race with the family profession. Be it that of a priest, politician or as in our case a ‘do kaudi’ ka Chef!
Me: Tum log kya school jate ho?
Kiddos: Nahe, time ella. Raat ko 3 baje sota hai, school jana kaisa subah?
Daddy ko help karna hai kaam ko..
Me: Tumhe padhna nahe hai kya?
(seriously, If someone had asked me this question, my answered would be in negative!)
Kiddos: Admission ke liye Paisa nahe hota hai..
Me: Padhne ke liye Paisa nahe, bas iccha mangta hai..
Yeh lo Rs. 200, kise bhi school ka uniform khared lo aur jao baito class mein. Hindustan ki abaadi itne hai ki kisi ko farak bhi nahe padega!
Kiddos: aur Pakda gaya toh?
Me: Pakde gaye toh simple. Kisi doosre school ka uniform kharedlo!
Rancho is a pure work of fiction, unrealistic and inexistent in the ‘Real World’. Needless to say, this scene of ‘3Idiots’ didn’t actually take place… :-/
All I could do was tweet my thoughts and write a blog. There are people who are assigned to deal with child labour, and I am not among them! Then Why I am writing this post?
Well, it pains to see kids of your own brother’s age being drilled in ways as cruel as torture. (This torture is in no way related to the torture elder bros give their younger bros!)
An eccentric Biologist once performed an experiment. He made a lamb starve for 20 days, the only source of energy being its own body fats. On the 21st day, the scientist provided it with a slice of Chicken breast, a food not a part of the traditional goat platter. To his utter disbelief the goat cherished every last bite of the meat. From then on, Chicken was a part of its daily diet.
Desperation drives beings crazy. I don’t see the kids unhappy or sad in what they are doing. On the contrary they are proud in aiding their Dads. The lamb and the kids don’t complain, they have adjusted to the new lease of life!
Although when the lamb looks at other goats of its age feed on lush green bushes, it does feel a bit weird, but then playing with bats and balls are for immature kids.
LIL KIDS…
Kids who are INNOCENT,
Something which the lamb irreversibly lost down the memory lane…
Side tracker: Some time back, there was this play at NITK, “The Death Trap”. Well, the objective of the play was to collect funds for issues pertaining to education of the girl child, school dropouts etc.
*Charity begins at home*
With the hope that this post reach the concerned people, with the ability to make a change, a hope not to be greeted with these children next time I go to the Night Canteen;
PAGE BREAK…
Sunday, April 3, 2011
I've seen it all!!
 |
| 20 YEARS HENCE! |
Disclaimer: No I am not Paul the Octopus, just a bloger with imagination running wild!
Dedicated to all the grey haired Indians who witnessed the 1983 WC and have been constntly bragging about their triumph to the gen-next.
The year 2030: (pardon me for the resemblence to himym!)
( By now I hope I am happily married with two kids, with my own beach view mini tower to reside in! )
Mr. Pingu to his kids,
“Guys today I’m gonna tell you a story, a story like no other, a story about a day when the country stood still and celebrated their ‘Indianess’. This goes back to 2011, the year India won the Cricket World Cup for the second time. When I saw cricket World Cup, I mean the extinct version of it, the 50 over cricket; not the T10 cricket you broods have today! A time when I was a 19 year old, with thick dense hair on my scalp. Can you believe this baldie staid dad of yours once used to be young, not so cool, but overly enthusiastic cricket fan?
We had just defeated our then neighbours Pakistan in the semis and faced Sri Lanka in the finals. (Pakistan, which now as you know is no longer a nation, a country dismantled by the hardliners and now governed by the United Nations)
Mrs. Pingu shouting from the kitchen, ”Dude, we’ve almost run out off oxygen supply for the month! Don’t just rest you bum on that couch, go to the neighbours and borrow some fresh air. And kids stop listening to his crazy stories, you have coaching classes to attend, his stories won’t get you admitted to IIT Surathkal! And anyways you can read his blog if you kids are so keen to emulate your dad.”
2nd April 2011: Even she witnessed history that day!
The second innings had just started, me and few of my college pals just stepped into the auditorium of IIT Surathkal, formerly known as NITK and there was pin drop silence. Sachin Tendulkar had just lost his wicket. Simultaneity of the two events: me stepping in SJA and Sachin getting out embarked upon me. Did I just jinx him? India in a spot of bother, I thought. There was no doubt about which team held the whip at that stage.
The match was being screened on the big screen, so what if it was 2-D? The vuvuzelas, the drums, the dhols, the horns, the whistles more than made up for the lack of todays’ technology.
Your grandpa had to see the 1983 world cup on the radio! (That doesn’t sound good does it? :P)
tik tok tik…Gambhir-Kohli stick…
tik tok tik… Kohli misses the trick…
tit tok tik…Dhoni bab stepsUP…
tik tok tik…Another partnership develops…
tik tok tik..Gambhir-Dhoni sway the tide…
tik tok tik, Gambhir commits suicide…
tik tok tik…Dhoni ka chakka…
tik tok tik..Nacha har koi, budha ho ya bacha…
Tik tok tik..India won Macha..India won Macha!
And rest as they call, was history. That’s one bad thing about history, It keeps repeating itself… 1983, 2011, 2017 and now in 2030 as well!
But 2011 was special in ways more than once. There was this time when I knew how to celebrate: the right way! Oh yeah I scream, I danced, high fives all around!
Chants of Sachin Sachin, yuvi yuvi galvanised SJA. And there was this tri-colour face painting just for 5 bucks! It went somewhat like this:
I know you kids must not even seen a five rupee coin, but that’s the way it was back then. Straight and simple unlike the card swiping technology of this age. For most part of the night celebrations remained clean and dry but there were these odd incidents at a local bar where few of our Bihari mates got into a scuffle. Us din toh saat kyun sau gunah maaf!
2017 things went a bit out of control, but if I start with that now, your mom is gonna make me sleep on the couch for the weekend!”
PS: Just 1 day has passed and I am already nostalgic...
With the wish that we can relive these moments,
PAGE BREAK…
Congratulations blogdosts!
Sunday, March 20, 2011
What’s the craziest thing you’ve done lately?
It’s my favourite time of the year again! Another of my year on this planet comes to a closure, and I am still struggling to decipher the meaning of my existence in this universe.
I sit on the broken chair of my hostel room today, trying to recollect the events from my life that stood out from the rest so. If one fine day I ever taste some substantial amount of success, I would like to write an autobiography and fill it up with all the wackiest and crazy stuffs I have ever done. As the guy on the $100 bill would say, “Either write something worth reading or do something worth writing”. Right here right now I attempt to do both!
Blogdosts, this post today is an attempt to spill the beans. An insight into my world.
Before I proceed any further I have a few instructions for the readers:
I. This blogpost is strictly for all homo-sapiens except my mom! So mom if you
are reading this please forgive me…
II. All those gossipers out there, remember,
“what happens on my page, stays on my page!”
Time has come when he breaks the shackles and gets out of the skin or fur, whatever a penguin is supposed to have!
OK here it goes, five of the many crazy stories with me in the lead role!
5. Loot gayi Izzat in Pizza’t:
This tale goes back many many years, but every time I think about it, the guilt of embarrassment fills my mind. Well I was small, as small as I would love to play in one of these!
Place: Chennai.
Me, one of my Chess buddy had a visit to the nearby Pizza Hut. After a strenuous chess session this was a kick-ass way to regulate the stress hormones. They had one of this amazing ball pools and within no time me and my pal plunged into the ballroom.
A few minutes into our play, the store manager gave orders to vacate the pool. What the hell mate? We aren't done! (Don’t be a pervert, its not the way it sounds!)
Apparently we were 6 years too old to be have a swim. 10-15 customers in the house, the kids staring at us, clearly we were the elephant in the room! Wonder what they were thinking about us..
‘how many glasses of complan do these two kids drink each day.
Mommy I want my complan dose to be doubled with immediate effect! I wanna be as tall as those two 10 year olds in the pool!’
The guy with the tie, mumbled a few life lessons and all that we could do was hold our heads down and say.
“Seri Seri Sir, Seri Seri!”
4. ‘Well Done’ Inversion:
Time: 3.30pm. Place: Coaching centre, Chemistry class.
Yawn Yawn…
As much as I love Organic Chemistry; I have always maintained that a gloomy cloudy afternoon is not the best time to express your love!
The teacher with no clue of my mood continued with his daily chores.
‘Substitution Nuclear Reactions’, written in dark bold letters on the board. Yawn Yawn…(2 yawns in two minutes..boy I was on fire! Hope that’s not the case with the reader too :P )
The spatial arrangement of the product molecule gets inverted relative to the reactant, commonly known as the umbrella effect or ‘Walden Inversion’.
And then it struck me. There is this someone in a class of around 100 students who has worn his t-shirt inside out! Crystal clear, no printed design, the stiches and the threads clearly visible…
A one look by any student any the news would spread like a chain reaction. From your best friends, to the bullies and even the chicks!
My heart started playing double base, from dhak…dhak to dhak dhak…dhak dhak..the sound so loud that overpowered my lethargy.
Keep a low profile, everything will be just fine I consoled myself.
“Any answers, Shubham?” the sir asked. ‘No sir not today, I have bigger issues to worry about then your petty questions!
30 minutes for the break, and my reputation at stake. Boy I wish I could go underground for a few a while! The clock struck four. With no restrooms nearby, I had to make a decision. Either risk it out for another 90 minutes by staying in the class or to go out in the open flash your flabs to the pedestrians and restore the damage done. I chose the latter. Period.
What happened next is best if kept a secret.
All said and done, it was an inversion “Well-done”!
3. Hit me if you can!
Well this time I was sick. Sick of the monotonous daily routine. I needed the adrenaline rush. Something to make things more worth while!
On a dark desert highway,
Cool wind in my hair,
Warm smell of colitis (yup 5th block was near by)
Rising through the air,
Up ahead in the distance,
I saw a shimmering light,
My head grew heavy and my sight grew dimmer,
Place: National Highway 17 Time: after dinner.
Three guys were on their way after a heavy dinner (food only ;)) at Sai Bhavani. One of them was still unsatisfied. Nothing seemed interesting to him at that time. Bored of tv series, no distant holidays to have a trip home and the frantic classes to make things worse.
There are these times when your friends stereotype you with a certain tag which they keep bragging about for eternity. Only way to stop the trend, cut loose, prove them wrong…
And then I did it...
To know what happened next and to check out the top two slots in my all time crazy deed list, tune in to your very own Pingu’s page
Till then adieus amigos!
To be continued…
Page break
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Monday, May 16, 2011
Pingu's Page: The Cut-Throat 'Biaaaatch'!
Pingu's Page: The Cut-Throat 'Biaaaatch'!: "Amber : It’s a game. You can either play for fun or play to win. If you want to win, you want cut-throat...."
Tuesday, May 3, 2011
When did I lose it? #Innocence
‘Swami ondu cheese sandwich kudi’, I asked the NC guy.
The NC guy shouts atop his voice, ‘ONJI CHEESE SANDWICH!’
I pay the bucks and turn my head to the left and a boy small enough to be in school starts to spread butter over the slices of bread. Occasionally he would wipe his nose, and simultaneously sniff the overhanging mucus. Drops of sweat would roll down his cheek. Invariantly some mass would get transferred from his nose to his hand and finally to my sandwich! Bonn appetit.. ;)
What do I do? I assume I suffer from short term amnesia and eat my sandwich.
‘Na tumne kuch kiya, na meine kuch dekha’! ;)
He was not alone, there were two more kids, much younger to him, one of whom served vada pav and the other was in charge for the cold beverages.
Then I began to wonder,1.45am in the night, when boys their age should be sound asleep, all set to go to their learning hubs the next day; These kids were catering to the needs of the ever hungry NITKians! As I learned out later, the sandwich kid was the Egg man’s son and the other two lil fellas were related to the Chef incharge for the Chinese dishes!
Some family tradition must say. We Indians are renowned to extend our *Khandani biznesh* Academic aspirations always loses the race with the family profession. Be it that of a priest, politician or as in our case a ‘do kaudi’ ka Chef!
Me: Tum log kya school jate ho?
Kiddos: Nahe, time ella. Raat ko 3 baje sota hai, school jana kaisa subah?
Daddy ko help karna hai kaam ko..
Me: Tumhe padhna nahe hai kya?
(seriously, If someone had asked me this question, my answered would be in negative!)
Kiddos: Admission ke liye Paisa nahe hota hai..
Me: Padhne ke liye Paisa nahe, bas iccha mangta hai..
Yeh lo Rs. 200, kise bhi school ka uniform khared lo aur jao baito class mein. Hindustan ki abaadi itne hai ki kisi ko farak bhi nahe padega!
Kiddos: aur Pakda gaya toh?
Me: Pakde gaye toh simple. Kisi doosre school ka uniform kharedlo!
Rancho is a pure work of fiction, unrealistic and inexistent in the ‘Real World’. Needless to say, this scene of ‘3Idiots’ didn’t actually take place… :-/
All I could do was tweet my thoughts and write a blog. There are people who are assigned to deal with child labour, and I am not among them! Then Why I am writing this post?
Well, it pains to see kids of your own brother’s age being drilled in ways as cruel as torture. (This torture is in no way related to the torture elder bros give their younger bros!)
An eccentric Biologist once performed an experiment. He made a lamb starve for 20 days, the only source of energy being its own body fats. On the 21st day, the scientist provided it with a slice of Chicken breast, a food not a part of the traditional goat platter. To his utter disbelief the goat cherished every last bite of the meat. From then on, Chicken was a part of its daily diet.
Desperation drives beings crazy. I don’t see the kids unhappy or sad in what they are doing. On the contrary they are proud in aiding their Dads. The lamb and the kids don’t complain, they have adjusted to the new lease of life!
Although when the lamb looks at other goats of its age feed on lush green bushes, it does feel a bit weird, but then playing with bats and balls are for immature kids.
LIL KIDS…
Kids who are INNOCENT,
Something which the lamb irreversibly lost down the memory lane…
Side tracker: Some time back, there was this play at NITK, “The Death Trap”. Well, the objective of the play was to collect funds for issues pertaining to education of the girl child, school dropouts etc.
*Charity begins at home*
With the hope that this post reach the concerned people, with the ability to make a change, a hope not to be greeted with these children next time I go to the Night Canteen;
PAGE BREAK…
Sunday, April 3, 2011
I've seen it all!!
|
| 20 YEARS HENCE! |
Disclaimer: No I am not Paul the Octopus, just a bloger with imagination running wild!
Dedicated to all the grey haired Indians who witnessed the 1983 WC and have been constntly bragging about their triumph to the gen-next.
The year 2030: (pardon me for the resemblence to himym!)
( By now I hope I am happily married with two kids, with my own beach view mini tower to reside in! )
Mr. Pingu to his kids,
“Guys today I’m gonna tell you a story, a story like no other, a story about a day when the country stood still and celebrated their ‘Indianess’. This goes back to 2011, the year India won the Cricket World Cup for the second time. When I saw cricket World Cup, I mean the extinct version of it, the 50 over cricket; not the T10 cricket you broods have today! A time when I was a 19 year old, with thick dense hair on my scalp. Can you believe this baldie staid dad of yours once used to be young, not so cool, but overly enthusiastic cricket fan?
We had just defeated our then neighbours Pakistan in the semis and faced Sri Lanka in the finals. (Pakistan, which now as you know is no longer a nation, a country dismantled by the hardliners and now governed by the United Nations)
Mrs. Pingu shouting from the kitchen, ”Dude, we’ve almost run out off oxygen supply for the month! Don’t just rest you bum on that couch, go to the neighbours and borrow some fresh air. And kids stop listening to his crazy stories, you have coaching classes to attend, his stories won’t get you admitted to IIT Surathkal! And anyways you can read his blog if you kids are so keen to emulate your dad.”
2nd April 2011: Even she witnessed history that day!
The second innings had just started, me and few of my college pals just stepped into the auditorium of IIT Surathkal, formerly known as NITK and there was pin drop silence. Sachin Tendulkar had just lost his wicket. Simultaneity of the two events: me stepping in SJA and Sachin getting out embarked upon me. Did I just jinx him? India in a spot of bother, I thought. There was no doubt about which team held the whip at that stage.
The match was being screened on the big screen, so what if it was 2-D? The vuvuzelas, the drums, the dhols, the horns, the whistles more than made up for the lack of todays’ technology.
Your grandpa had to see the 1983 world cup on the radio! (That doesn’t sound good does it? :P)
tik tok tik…Gambhir-Kohli stick…
tik tok tik… Kohli misses the trick…
tit tok tik…Dhoni bab stepsUP…
tik tok tik…Another partnership develops…
tik tok tik..Gambhir-Dhoni sway the tide…
tik tok tik, Gambhir commits suicide…
tik tok tik…Dhoni ka chakka…
tik tok tik..Nacha har koi, budha ho ya bacha…
Tik tok tik..India won Macha..India won Macha!
And rest as they call, was history. That’s one bad thing about history, It keeps repeating itself… 1983, 2011, 2017 and now in 2030 as well!
But 2011 was special in ways more than once. There was this time when I knew how to celebrate: the right way! Oh yeah I scream, I danced, high fives all around!
Chants of Sachin Sachin, yuvi yuvi galvanised SJA. And there was this tri-colour face painting just for 5 bucks! It went somewhat like this:
I know you kids must not even seen a five rupee coin, but that’s the way it was back then. Straight and simple unlike the card swiping technology of this age. For most part of the night celebrations remained clean and dry but there were these odd incidents at a local bar where few of our Bihari mates got into a scuffle. Us din toh saat kyun sau gunah maaf!
2017 things went a bit out of control, but if I start with that now, your mom is gonna make me sleep on the couch for the weekend!”
PS: Just 1 day has passed and I am already nostalgic...
With the wish that we can relive these moments,
PAGE BREAK…
Congratulations blogdosts!
Sunday, March 20, 2011
What’s the craziest thing you’ve done lately?
It’s my favourite time of the year again! Another of my year on this planet comes to a closure, and I am still struggling to decipher the meaning of my existence in this universe.
I sit on the broken chair of my hostel room today, trying to recollect the events from my life that stood out from the rest so. If one fine day I ever taste some substantial amount of success, I would like to write an autobiography and fill it up with all the wackiest and crazy stuffs I have ever done. As the guy on the $100 bill would say, “Either write something worth reading or do something worth writing”. Right here right now I attempt to do both!
Blogdosts, this post today is an attempt to spill the beans. An insight into my world.
Before I proceed any further I have a few instructions for the readers:
I. This blogpost is strictly for all homo-sapiens except my mom! So mom if you
are reading this please forgive me…
II. All those gossipers out there, remember,
“what happens on my page, stays on my page!”
Time has come when he breaks the shackles and gets out of the skin or fur, whatever a penguin is supposed to have!
OK here it goes, five of the many crazy stories with me in the lead role!
5. Loot gayi Izzat in Pizza’t:
This tale goes back many many years, but every time I think about it, the guilt of embarrassment fills my mind. Well I was small, as small as I would love to play in one of these!
Place: Chennai.
Me, one of my Chess buddy had a visit to the nearby Pizza Hut. After a strenuous chess session this was a kick-ass way to regulate the stress hormones. They had one of this amazing ball pools and within no time me and my pal plunged into the ballroom.
A few minutes into our play, the store manager gave orders to vacate the pool. What the hell mate? We aren't done! (Don’t be a pervert, its not the way it sounds!)
Apparently we were 6 years too old to be have a swim. 10-15 customers in the house, the kids staring at us, clearly we were the elephant in the room! Wonder what they were thinking about us..
‘how many glasses of complan do these two kids drink each day.
Mommy I want my complan dose to be doubled with immediate effect! I wanna be as tall as those two 10 year olds in the pool!’
The guy with the tie, mumbled a few life lessons and all that we could do was hold our heads down and say.
“Seri Seri Sir, Seri Seri!”
4. ‘Well Done’ Inversion:
Time: 3.30pm. Place: Coaching centre, Chemistry class.
Yawn Yawn…
As much as I love Organic Chemistry; I have always maintained that a gloomy cloudy afternoon is not the best time to express your love!
The teacher with no clue of my mood continued with his daily chores.
‘Substitution Nuclear Reactions’, written in dark bold letters on the board. Yawn Yawn…(2 yawns in two minutes..boy I was on fire! Hope that’s not the case with the reader too :P )
The spatial arrangement of the product molecule gets inverted relative to the reactant, commonly known as the umbrella effect or ‘Walden Inversion’.
And then it struck me. There is this someone in a class of around 100 students who has worn his t-shirt inside out! Crystal clear, no printed design, the stiches and the threads clearly visible…
A one look by any student any the news would spread like a chain reaction. From your best friends, to the bullies and even the chicks!
My heart started playing double base, from dhak…dhak to dhak dhak…dhak dhak..the sound so loud that overpowered my lethargy.
Keep a low profile, everything will be just fine I consoled myself.
“Any answers, Shubham?” the sir asked. ‘No sir not today, I have bigger issues to worry about then your petty questions!
30 minutes for the break, and my reputation at stake. Boy I wish I could go underground for a few a while! The clock struck four. With no restrooms nearby, I had to make a decision. Either risk it out for another 90 minutes by staying in the class or to go out in the open flash your flabs to the pedestrians and restore the damage done. I chose the latter. Period.
What happened next is best if kept a secret.
All said and done, it was an inversion “Well-done”!
3. Hit me if you can!
Well this time I was sick. Sick of the monotonous daily routine. I needed the adrenaline rush. Something to make things more worth while!
On a dark desert highway,
Cool wind in my hair,
Warm smell of colitis (yup 5th block was near by)
Rising through the air,
Up ahead in the distance,
I saw a shimmering light,
My head grew heavy and my sight grew dimmer,
Place: National Highway 17 Time: after dinner.
Three guys were on their way after a heavy dinner (food only ;)) at Sai Bhavani. One of them was still unsatisfied. Nothing seemed interesting to him at that time. Bored of tv series, no distant holidays to have a trip home and the frantic classes to make things worse.
There are these times when your friends stereotype you with a certain tag which they keep bragging about for eternity. Only way to stop the trend, cut loose, prove them wrong…
And then I did it...
To know what happened next and to check out the top two slots in my all time crazy deed list, tune in to your very own Pingu’s page
Till then adieus amigos!
To be continued…
Page break
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Posts (Atom)